Tonight I sat at a table of fifteen women, realizing I only know one of them and the truth is that I don't know her all that well. Brenda was celebrating a friend's birthday tonight at Chili's and invited me to go with her. As we were all gathered at a big table, conversation touched on several different topics. I was enamored at the work gossip thrown around the table and the venting that seemed to get them all worked up. Throw in a couple cosmopolitans and you've got a rowdy crowd. I had no connection whatsoever so I had the pleasure of people watching with an open invitation! It was great entertainment but even more than that, it was a great experience. I sat around a table with fifteen women who were all very different from the next, listening to their life experiences from battling cancer to flatlining during childbirth.
I don't know how I ended up at that table and I don't know the plan God has for me. I'm still not sure what the reason was for being so drawn to this family in Texas but I do know that it's an adventure. I'm just learning to embrace it as such.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Just Say No...To Acid Washed Jeans
Got out of the house tonight for a couple of hours with Neil. In my job description it states something about taking Neil out once every two weeks, just the two of us. Tonight we went to the Star Cinema Grill to eat and watch a movie. He chose The Tooth Fairy. Surprisingly enough it was actually pretty funny. People seem surprised that Dwayne Johnson can act...but isn't that what the WWE is? Acting?
Neil is eight. He never stops talking. His imagination runs full speed at all times. I have a hard time locking my attention in on him especially with two toddlers running around tipping chairs and pushing lamps off the end tables. I can rarely follow and keep up with his conversation so I'm trying to learn how to time my head nods and "mm hmm's" just right. He's smart, very smart for an eight year old. Makes me curious to know who he'll be in ten years.
Oh, and he LOVES 80s music, just like his dad. Driving home tonight I was scanning through radio stations and just happened to land on an 80s rock station. Some Metallica song came on and Neil literally screamed, "TURN IT UP, THIS SONG TOTALLY ROCKS!" He was head banging with his fists in the air the entire time. Neil says we got lucky because we hit the station right at the VERY BEGINNING of the song. I was almost as thrilled as he was. (Insert sarcasm and eye-rolling as you see fit)
Note: 80s music makes me cringe. :)
Neil is eight. He never stops talking. His imagination runs full speed at all times. I have a hard time locking my attention in on him especially with two toddlers running around tipping chairs and pushing lamps off the end tables. I can rarely follow and keep up with his conversation so I'm trying to learn how to time my head nods and "mm hmm's" just right. He's smart, very smart for an eight year old. Makes me curious to know who he'll be in ten years.
Oh, and he LOVES 80s music, just like his dad. Driving home tonight I was scanning through radio stations and just happened to land on an 80s rock station. Some Metallica song came on and Neil literally screamed, "TURN IT UP, THIS SONG TOTALLY ROCKS!" He was head banging with his fists in the air the entire time. Neil says we got lucky because we hit the station right at the VERY BEGINNING of the song. I was almost as thrilled as he was. (Insert sarcasm and eye-rolling as you see fit)
Note: 80s music makes me cringe. :)
Monday, January 25, 2010
Stop and Smell the Roses
This weekend I took a little roadtrip up to the hill country. Beautiful hill country. Grandpa Jack and Grandma Lois were up there for awhile and invited me up to visit for the weekend. In my twenty-three years I've been to a few different states and visited a few different sites but have never really experienced them. I've lived in Texas for two weeks now and have really grown to like the change of scenery but still miss Kansas and the people there. Driving up to the parking lot of Walgreen's in Burnet, Texas and seeing my grandparents wave from their van was like being home again.
Texas is beautiful. For the first time I was able to really see the world around me. In Kansas I never paid any attention because it was home and nothing new. Out here everything is new. The weather is different. The people are different. The driving is different. Nothing is familiar. For the first time, I was able to stop and take it all in: the sound of the water rippling in the lake at the resort, the absolutely huge logs that constructed the houses at another resort, the smell of the fresh country air, the stars shining bright. Stop and smell the roses is a cliche that gets tossed around a lot but really hit home this weekend.
I was also able to spend some really great quality time with my grandparents. I hadn't realized but it has been years since we've done that. Just the three of us. We played skip-bo last night and I had to get a quick refresher course on the rules (I'm still not sure how many were legitimate rules and how many were their own). My opinion may be a bit biased but nonetheless, they are truly two of the most amazing people I know and the best grandparents anyone could ask for. They have some of the best stories to tell and tell them so well. I was entertained all weekend. Lightbulbs magically turned on in the cabinets and Kaboom was left to dry on the shower doors.
Driving home late this afternoon and on into this evening, I was able to take in a beautiful Texas sunset and then before entering the city, able to see the stars again. It was a relaxing weekend full of love, entertainment, sharing memories and telling stories and also making new memories.
My goal is to try harder to open my eyes and truly see the beautiful world that God has created.
Texas is beautiful. For the first time I was able to really see the world around me. In Kansas I never paid any attention because it was home and nothing new. Out here everything is new. The weather is different. The people are different. The driving is different. Nothing is familiar. For the first time, I was able to stop and take it all in: the sound of the water rippling in the lake at the resort, the absolutely huge logs that constructed the houses at another resort, the smell of the fresh country air, the stars shining bright. Stop and smell the roses is a cliche that gets tossed around a lot but really hit home this weekend.
I was also able to spend some really great quality time with my grandparents. I hadn't realized but it has been years since we've done that. Just the three of us. We played skip-bo last night and I had to get a quick refresher course on the rules (I'm still not sure how many were legitimate rules and how many were their own). My opinion may be a bit biased but nonetheless, they are truly two of the most amazing people I know and the best grandparents anyone could ask for. They have some of the best stories to tell and tell them so well. I was entertained all weekend. Lightbulbs magically turned on in the cabinets and Kaboom was left to dry on the shower doors.
Driving home late this afternoon and on into this evening, I was able to take in a beautiful Texas sunset and then before entering the city, able to see the stars again. It was a relaxing weekend full of love, entertainment, sharing memories and telling stories and also making new memories.
My goal is to try harder to open my eyes and truly see the beautiful world that God has created.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Knowing.
Needless to say, I am still trying to adjust and will be for weeks I am sure of that, but the last two days have been especially difficult for whatever reason. I lived in a house that was too big for me and my things for eight months with the company of only my dog. I absolutely loved living by myself. If there was ever a mess to clean, it was mine. If I wanted to sing and dance around in my living room, I could. No roommates, or roommates' boyfriends, or loud 4am wake up calls. During that time, I had a friend tell me that I would be single forever because I liked living by myself too much. True? Maybe. Likely? Doubt it. Anyway, my point is that I do love some "me time."
Now living in a new house, with new people, in a different state where I don't know a single soul...all of which I was prepared for. I am employed by the same people that I live with. I work in the house that I live in. The dilemna that I face is this: How do I know where to draw the line? How do I know when to say "no" or in my case, politely decline? When I'm invited to do something with the family but haven't had a single minute to myself ALL day, how do I say..."I'd rather be alone."? It sounds horrible, I know. This family is great. The kids are great and the parents absolutely love their kids. I enjoy spending time with all of them but I want to be able to maintain some separation. When I decline an invitation to watch a movie, I see the look of disappointment on their faces and then I feel guilty so I end up joining them anyway. I can't give in everytime or I'll lose sight of my own life and identity and be lost when I rejoin civilization on my own...or at least, that is my fear. So, my goal is to learn to spend enough time with them outside of my working hours, to keep them happy but to also spend enough time alone, to keep myself happy too!
Now living in a new house, with new people, in a different state where I don't know a single soul...all of which I was prepared for. I am employed by the same people that I live with. I work in the house that I live in. The dilemna that I face is this: How do I know where to draw the line? How do I know when to say "no" or in my case, politely decline? When I'm invited to do something with the family but haven't had a single minute to myself ALL day, how do I say..."I'd rather be alone."? It sounds horrible, I know. This family is great. The kids are great and the parents absolutely love their kids. I enjoy spending time with all of them but I want to be able to maintain some separation. When I decline an invitation to watch a movie, I see the look of disappointment on their faces and then I feel guilty so I end up joining them anyway. I can't give in everytime or I'll lose sight of my own life and identity and be lost when I rejoin civilization on my own...or at least, that is my fear. So, my goal is to learn to spend enough time with them outside of my working hours, to keep them happy but to also spend enough time alone, to keep myself happy too!
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
The Sound of Music
The Sound of Music is a classic. By far one of the most memorable films I have ever seen. I only wish I spoke with an accent identical to that of Julie Andrews. Mary Poppins was great, too! Today I needed a Mary Poppins bag of tricks. Shelby wanted to see a monkey, then she wanted the sun to shine instead of it raining all day, then it was food from the Rain Forest Cafe, a bucket of candy, a root beer in a bottle, and a tub of bendy straws...none of which we had.
Today was also a day that I was unexpectedly blessed with insight into a three year old's thought process. She wanted so badly to bake cookies today. I was tired, had a headache and wasn't sure I wanted to go through the flour sifting/spilling, egg shell hunting, 2-3 hour process WITH a typical three year old who has an attention span of 5 minutes or less. I gave in...and then realized Shelby wasn't talking about actually making cookie dough from scratch, there was pillsbury cookie dough in the fridge. The only things I had to do were set the oven and hunt for a cookie sheet. Something so simple made her day. She told me I was the best ever and then gave me a giant hug. When I took them out of the oven we were watching Peter Pan and she asked if I grew up...my answer? "I'm working on it, Shelby." She smiled, laughed and then said..."Good cause grown-ups can drive me to Rain Forest Cafe!"
I am constantly entertained by this little girl. She's smart and picks up things so fast. And here's a video to prove just how dang cute she is.
http://www.vimeo.com/8880770
Today was also a day that I was unexpectedly blessed with insight into a three year old's thought process. She wanted so badly to bake cookies today. I was tired, had a headache and wasn't sure I wanted to go through the flour sifting/spilling, egg shell hunting, 2-3 hour process WITH a typical three year old who has an attention span of 5 minutes or less. I gave in...and then realized Shelby wasn't talking about actually making cookie dough from scratch, there was pillsbury cookie dough in the fridge. The only things I had to do were set the oven and hunt for a cookie sheet. Something so simple made her day. She told me I was the best ever and then gave me a giant hug. When I took them out of the oven we were watching Peter Pan and she asked if I grew up...my answer? "I'm working on it, Shelby." She smiled, laughed and then said..."Good cause grown-ups can drive me to Rain Forest Cafe!"
I am constantly entertained by this little girl. She's smart and picks up things so fast. And here's a video to prove just how dang cute she is.
http://www.vimeo.com/8880770
I'm a blogger...
What to write on my first official blogging session... I already spent so much time reviewing and editing all of the settings now I am finding it hard to remember what it is I wanted to say in this first one. Hate it when that happens. Oh well, the show must go on...
A New Journey...
Someone told me the other day that I was "lucky" to have the opportunity to pick up my life, relocate and start all over. That isn't luck, it's a choice. I don't see this move as starting over, but as a new journey and experience. I've been asked what it is that I'm running away from in Kansas. I'm not running from anything or anyone. I "ran" toward an opportunity that I worked for. I put in the hours of research and "job hunting" and didn't settle with the first offer thrown on the table. This was a big step and I had to make it a very careful and detail oriented process.
Becoming a nanny is something I've talked about doing since I was in high school. But up until two months ago, that's all I had done was simply talk about it. Finally, I got up the nerve to propose the idea to my mom, expecting to be dissuaded against it but to my surprise, she supported me. So, there it was. What I needed to start the process was the afirmation of my mother's support, afterall, her opinion is the one that matters most to me.
The next step was to do research. Nobody has really understood the hours I had to put in to make sure I didn't end up on some scam website or scooped up by a family of lunatics. I joined websites for nannies and families to be matched up and created a profile on each of them. I was as down right honest as I could be without scaring people off after only reading the first open-ended question! Since I had no prior nanny experience I just figured getting matched with a great family that was open to that was going to be impossible. I was wrong, yes, I admit it. I quickly began receiving e-mails and phone calls from families all over the country. Some of them were definite "no's" right off but a lot of them seemed so great but just weren't the family for me. After a two month long search I was blessed with the family that would soon become my Texas family.
On January 8, 2010, I packed up my car and left my mom, sister and stepdad behind on a farm in Kansas. On January 9, 2010, I pulled up into the driveway of my new home. I have now put in a full week with the family and can honestly say that I don't regret my decision. I'm fresh out of champagne or I would celebrate and toast to taking a giant leap and kicking my debilitating anxiety's bum. :)
More to come...
A New Journey...
Someone told me the other day that I was "lucky" to have the opportunity to pick up my life, relocate and start all over. That isn't luck, it's a choice. I don't see this move as starting over, but as a new journey and experience. I've been asked what it is that I'm running away from in Kansas. I'm not running from anything or anyone. I "ran" toward an opportunity that I worked for. I put in the hours of research and "job hunting" and didn't settle with the first offer thrown on the table. This was a big step and I had to make it a very careful and detail oriented process.
Becoming a nanny is something I've talked about doing since I was in high school. But up until two months ago, that's all I had done was simply talk about it. Finally, I got up the nerve to propose the idea to my mom, expecting to be dissuaded against it but to my surprise, she supported me. So, there it was. What I needed to start the process was the afirmation of my mother's support, afterall, her opinion is the one that matters most to me.
The next step was to do research. Nobody has really understood the hours I had to put in to make sure I didn't end up on some scam website or scooped up by a family of lunatics. I joined websites for nannies and families to be matched up and created a profile on each of them. I was as down right honest as I could be without scaring people off after only reading the first open-ended question! Since I had no prior nanny experience I just figured getting matched with a great family that was open to that was going to be impossible. I was wrong, yes, I admit it. I quickly began receiving e-mails and phone calls from families all over the country. Some of them were definite "no's" right off but a lot of them seemed so great but just weren't the family for me. After a two month long search I was blessed with the family that would soon become my Texas family.
On January 8, 2010, I packed up my car and left my mom, sister and stepdad behind on a farm in Kansas. On January 9, 2010, I pulled up into the driveway of my new home. I have now put in a full week with the family and can honestly say that I don't regret my decision. I'm fresh out of champagne or I would celebrate and toast to taking a giant leap and kicking my debilitating anxiety's bum. :)
More to come...
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